A game of Blindwippitt's Buff, using my new blanky ... Angel takes advantage to steal my tortoise
It's my birthday today (I'm eight if you're interested) and if Angel can have can have a whole post to herself when it's her turn, then so can I. Breakfast was followed by a strawberry and after a brief lie-in, the rain held off for my birthday run with lots of balls to chase ... then we came back and after a detour via the butcher's (you'd think the Madwoman would attempt to plan ahead a bit more. She's known now for months that it's my birthday today) to collect some chicken for my birthday tea, I finally got to open my presents. I got a new fleece blanky like Angel's, only a proper butch boy-blue, some stinky sticks (strips of dried tripe. Delicious. You really must try them - but buy your own. I'm not sharing) and a squeaky tortoise. Then we had some party games, including frisbee catching, and one of our favourites, Press the Button, which involves a LOT of treats and running around, so is always good fun. Just time for a nap before tea ... if the Madwoman pulls her finger out and gets on with cooking the chicken for it.
We were waiting for some treats to be doled out this morning in return for a bit of paw waving (we try to humour the Madwoman if we think we might profit from it) when we caught sight of the packet label. 'Treats for Chubby Dogs' it said. What a nerve! I mean, do we look chubby? We are fit and streamlined: Archie doesn't even have any spare fur, let alone spare fat. It's Archie's birthday tomorrow, and there had better be something a bit better on offer than low calorie snacks. Feel free to drop in and find out - the Madwoman says you can give us all the virtual treats you want, as they're low-fat and calorie free. Personally, since she thinks they are so wonderful, we'd prefer it if you gave them to her (she needs them more than us anyway) and if you can't actually call in with anything more substantial and tasty,then just pop it in the post. We'll be waiting hungrily by the letterbox.
Opening my presents, and playing with my birthday vulture
Well, now I am six, at any rate. It's my birthday and I shall blog if I want to - today this blog is all MINE!
It's not been too bad a birthday: after breakfast I went back to bed and had a little lie-in, and then had a phone call from Stinky Boy. It sounded like him but when I sniffed and licked the phone it didn't smell or taste like him. And having happy birthday sung to you is all very well, but it's not the same as a proper present - after all, I shall only be six once, I shall never be six again, and I need proper presents to celebrate with. Then the Madwoman took me and Archie out for a birthday walk. We met a man staring up at the sky and scratching his head. He told us he'd lost the moon. Yes, really. You couldn't make it up ... Then we got home and at last it was time for my presents. I got a snuggly girly pink and orange fleece for my bed to keep me warm now the nights are getting a bit colder (the Madwoman will insist on leaving a window open, so warm blankies are essential) and a pack of dried-ready-to-eat sausages (except I've only had one so far, and had to share it with Archie) and a stuffed squeaky vulture. Just what I always wanted.
At the moment I can smell chicken roasting in the oven, so it's cooled in time ready for my birthday dinner later. No doubt I'll be expected to share that with Archie too. There is also a chunk of liver bread waiting for the party games later on: the Madwoman has promised Spinny, Doggy Dominoes and poke the button. Off for a quick nap now, before more birthday partying!
We have been too busy relaxing to post for a few days; it takes application you know! When the temptation to leap up and pound away on the computer keyboard started to become too great we pulled a fleece over our heads and free of any distractions, concentrated on a bit of intensive napping. A small upset this morning, when the Madwoman found a swollen bump on Archie's neck which closer inspection showed had broken skin. She thinks Angel may have nabbed him when he tried to distract her from shrieking abuse at a cat in the garden ... we know what happened, and we're not telling. We're not talking to each other at the moment either.
This morning we chased tennis balls and squeaky toy bunnies, then this afternoon we returned to the Chiltern Open Air Museum to do a bit of stalking - this time of the Horrible Histories cast. We ran them to ground eating their lunch (no, they didn't offer to share) and the Madwoman flourished a DVD under their noses and asked them to sign it. They kindly agreed - although we suspect that it was possibly to get her to go away so they could eat in peace and quiet ... Of course, it could also have had a lot to do with the fact that we looked our very cutest, and that the signed DVD is in aid of raising money for the Emergency Kennelling fund being organised by Sighthounds Online. This is to help those dogs in pounds which have only a seven-day stay before being euthanased find a place in emergency kennelling while a place in rescue kennels or a home is being sorted out for them. One of our predecessors, a big hairy person called Boris, was rescued on his last day by the Madwoman, so it's a fund raiser close to her heart. We think it's a pretty good idea too. So please thank Horrible Histories and it's lovely cast, and please support Sighthounds Online -you can find out more at www.sighthoundsonline.org.uk - and keep an eye out there for details of how you can place a bid for the autographed DVD!
And not a single person asked us for a pawtograph!
We went for a stroll round the Open Air Museum this afternoon: Horrible Histories were busy filming there. We watched for a while as witches, soldiers and kings wandered around and rehearsed a bit, whilst pursued by a flock of film crew people: it would appear that for every actor there are at least 6 other people - that's the ratio we counted here but no doubt there are more as there were hordes of others in the carpark. We quickly got bored but had to wait to set off down the track towards our car until they'd finished dragging a portaloo along it, leaving it in place next to the field they were filming in. When we passed it there was a sign hanging on the door saying 'Out of order'. So what was the point of going to all that bother? Especially as there is a much nicer permanent toilet block right next to the field anyway ... The whole thing is a mystery to us. Not that we ever use them ourselves you understand: the seats are poorly designed for wippitts, and far too high. No, we make do with a bit of grass (watch out for nettles) or discreetly behind a tree if one is conveniently handy. Of course, you do need to take a human with you to pick up the more ... solid ... offerings.
Angel is rather partial to a bit of salad with some bite. She has her own personal salad bar (you'll be able to read more about this next year in the book on dog friendly gardening which she and Archie have written, although no doubt the Madwoman will attempt to steal the credit for it as usual), but now the American Land Cress is past it's best, she has to nibble on nasturtiums instead. Right, that's the starter ... where's the main course?
Archie got scrobbled by a cat yesterday ... while harmlessly pottering around outside, enjoying the sunshine and a nibble of grass he was ambushed by an evil kitty which leapt into the garden on top of him. Covered in bites and scratches and hobbling around on three legs after the close encounter, he had to be whisked off to the emergency vets for antibiotics and an eye check. The Madwoman had to go back again later for painkillers and anti-inflams as he was in so much pain from his lame leg, which had also become really swollen and tender by this time. It hurt so much in fact, that he took to the sofa and refused his dinner. Angel did offer to eat it for him, but wasn't allowed to. Off to our regular vet this morning, where he had a much more sympathetic reception as well as more drugs, and is feeling much better as a result.
Too much to expect get any well wishes or treats we suppose after the total lack of them when Angel got bitten by a bee - but maybe you'd like to join our campaign to rid the world of evil kitties?
The Madwoman finally got herself organised and took us treasure hunting yesterday - as promised in previous blogs. Due to the unseasonally hot weather Archie didn't get to dress up in his rather fetching Cap'n Archie Sparrow jumper, or Angel to don her scourge-of-the-evil-kitties bandanna, but fun was had all round.
If you want to teach your human how to organise a treasure hunt for you it's very simple - even the stupidest human can learn how to do it. They run round (the exercise is good for them) and hide treats and toys, which you then get to hunt out and liberate. Angel likes to have treats hidden under soft toys, flower pots and those little sports cone thingys, rolled up in towels, or inside empty eggboxes. Archie likes these too, but best of all he likes hunting for tennis balls.
You can play this game in the garden or around the house if it's a bit cold and wet out: or if you are really lucky and can persuade your human to make one for you, digging for treasure in your very own digging pit is pretty good too ...